Bad agents
September 12, 2006Via Miss Snark, a list of the 20 worst literary agents as compiled by Writer Beware. I’m happy to say my agent and her agency are not on the list, but then again neither are a couple of my past agents.
Most tyro writers think that landing a literary agent will solve all their problems, that it will magically open all doors and that it will guarantee them sales. Wrong, wrong and wrong again.
Getting an agent does not solve your problems, it merely introduces you to new problems at a higher level, the chief one being: Is this agent the right one for my work? An agent who’s lazy or disorganized, or one who simply doesn’t Get What You Do is worse than no agent at all.
Getting an agent doesn’t magically open all doors, though it does give you a shot at grabbing some doorknobs. One of the crazy-making things about Life On Digital Grub Street is that all the things that would get you through the door in other fields — talent, perserverance, hard work — don’t get you far here. They merely get you a place on line. But you want a place on that line, so you cultivate the talent, you keep plugging at it and you do the hard work. You also do everything you can to get an agent, because anyone who tells you an agent isn’t necessary is pulling your leg. There are isolated incidences of somebody getting a book contract by throwing a manuscript over an editor’s garden wall, or hiring a hooker to wear his book proposal as edible body paint, or by befriending a publisher’s albino snaggle-tooth son, or signing on as an au pair and casually leaving a manuscript under the baby’s nebulizer. If you want to go that route, then vaya con dios, good luck and don’t forget to write, cause we sure ain’t gonna be seeing much of you.
That said, you should also be ready to part ways with an agent if things aren’t working out. It’s a business relationship, after all, and if your agent is a guy who spends his time going to parties while leaving the reading of manuscripts to his subordinates (Do I know such an agent? Oy, I could write a book!) then how is he going to be an advocate for your work?
So don’t be afraid to say goodbye. In fact, just don’t be afraid. But if you were a fearful person, you probably wouldn’t be in this line of work.
November 30, 2006 at 10:47 am
Thank you, Steve. This is practical information for me. One of my instructors, a published novelist herself, used to be a reader at William Morris and told me I shouldn’t have any trouble getting some of my fiction published. She said that based on my Full-Length Mirrors manuscript. That was three years ago. Lazy me, I still haven’t gotten around to looking for an agent or beating the publishing path period. I have a suspicion getting picked up won’t be the piece of cake suggested.
Nordette
March 20, 2007 at 1:47 pm
Are there any fiction literary agents that do not require a synopsis… I dislike this because to give a synopsis destroys the unfolding of the story.
March 20, 2007 at 3:44 pm
Not that I’m aware of. Most agents wants the first 50 or so pages and then a synopsis of the rest. I cannot emphasize strongly enough that you should follow the agency’s submission guidelines exactly, or your work will go unread.